This Saturday is one Nona and Pops have been looking forward to and thankfully is now enjoying. Our granddaughter Brennan is spending the day, and the night and tomorrow morning with us. We are so excited. This of course is a source of great joy! Sometimes I don't embrace joy enough and am anxious and worried about many things(yes, I can be a Martha). These silly things do suppress the abundant joy I do have as a husband, father, grand-father and deacon. I let work related stuff bother me more than I should, I fret over cutting the grass during the summer and I am always on the lookout for this elusive thing called rest and sleep.
But there is always joy in the grandkids, like today and Brennan's visit, like the end of July with several days in the presence of Calvin and Katelyn, including the anticipation of being around for Calvin's 7th birthday in a couple of weeks. There was profound joy today in the opportunity I had to Baptize out two newest Christians, Jackson Gerard and Elle Grace! There will be other moments and opportunities of joy, as there is every day. My vision seems to strain sometimes to find or recognize such joy while my vision is crystal clear with frustration. That's a me thing that needs to change huh. And I know this.
Right now, as I write, the baby taking a nap(sounds delightful), it's raining and all I can think about is you can't cut grass in the rain. The rain, by the way, has been falling for almost two weeks now and the forecast is rainy until Wednesday. Sometimes I joke that I'll let November handle the grass, it might not be a joke. Or how about the beginning of this crazy Saturday. Let me tell you.
Never, and I mean never, does anything wake up my wife at 5:15 in the morning but I heard her wake up and she asked me a simple question: what was that smell. I checked first to make sure it was not me and my dog and I realized she was not dreaming; something kind of smelled funny. Up I get, crack of dawn and walk up front to find the guest bathroom toilet overflowing, everything is soaked. I hobble to the bedroom again and our toilet is doing the same. Water everywhere, even on a small portion of the bedroom carpet. I panic, a typical reaction, have dreams of $ 10,000 septic repairs, managed to turn off the water and I tell Wendy, we can't possibly watch a grandchild with such a disaster. Until I heard Wendy yell, I fixed it. You fixed it1 What the heck are you talking about you fixed it? Get this; in cleaning the home in preparation for Brennan(she is all of 18 months y'all), Wendy used one of those blue thingy's in the back of the toilet in the guest bathroom. Somehow that oval ball of blue managed to get perfectly stuck in the drain and water had no where to go. In my house, on it's journey out the water must have flowed to the back toilet and overwhelmed it too. That now explains why the water on the floor was a combination blue/green color. Long story short, it was not a major crisis as I envisioned, we cleaned it up before the sun even comes up, all good and we are now enjoying our Saturday afternoon. But make no mistake, I was ready to hit the panic button.
This is all very interesting to me because over the course of my 11 year diaconate, I have talked to more than a handful of people about finding joy, finding peace, resting in His perfect peace, smelling the roses, looking for the good in everyone you encounter, having some fun, laughing when laughing is good for the soul. I have talked to others about this joy and peace inside a 1200 men state run prison, in the hallways and corridors of nursing homes, hospice care, hospitals, inside church, on the front steps of church, at meetings, at work, you get it huh. Yet I find myself today trying to come to terms with: hear what the Holy Spirit gives you to help others for yourself big boy. I also hear a little practice what you preach, especially the part about enjoying those wonderful moments, those special days. And then, the hard part, taking those moments and days and seeing them in everything, and everyone and everyday.
Right here, right now, I got my beautiful granddaughter with me, I got to baptize two beautiful children from two beautiful families, I'm getting ready to go and assist Mass, the very essence of which is pure joy. I'm still looking for joy and peace, not because it is not there, but because I need to recognize it, especially in it's ordinariness.
Hey, rain will fall, toilets may even overflow, far worse disappointments and even tragedies may come along, but He is always there, His Peace, perfect and complete is always available. I will look a little harder, as I look for joy and peace. May you always encounter His perfect peace.
No comments:
Post a Comment