You gotta be
Cruel to be kind in the right measure
Cruel to be kind it's a very good sign
Cruel to be kind means that I love you
Baby, you gotta be cruel to be kind
These lyrics were very popular back in the seventies as sung by a one hit wonder named Nick Lowe.
Now let me say upfront, the word cruel is harsh, perhaps a little too over the top to prove a point in today's homily. Still, I am willing to bet that almost everybody, on first hearing today's Gospel, thinks that some of the dialogue between Jesus and the woman almost sounds cruel. In a moment, we will see why this is not so. And it is not so! Let me be clear, nothing about Jesus and His most Holy Church, that's all of us by the way, is cruel.
I do think most of us, once we achieve a certain age and maturity, can look back and recall moments of discipline or instruction that at the moment they occurred seemed harsh, maybe even cruel but at some point, in measured reflection, were acts of love, lessons for our own well being!
As people of faith, we must see in every action and word of Jesus pure love, pointing us to the Father and for our own "well being".
In Matthew's Gospel today we find Jesus traveling to another region and encountering a Canaanite woman. Now for a little context; Israelites and Canaanites didn't get along very well; in fact many in Israel would consider the Canaanite dirty, filthy people, no better than dogs. Yet here we find Jesus in the company of a Canaanite and a woman. Right away we have a clue about this woman. How would one not an Israelite, not living in the right region, hardly a follower of Jesus possess the ability to ask Jesus to have pity on me and declare Him son of David? And she makes this statement of faith in need of a healing, she needs a miracle for her daughter. Oh my, unlike so many other times in Scripture, Jesus ignores this woman, then as she perseveres Jesus tells her sternly, it would not be right to grant for her what should be granted to the lost ones of Israel. He goes so far as to say helping her would be like taking food from his own people only to toss it to dogs. Did Jesus just call this woman, begging for her daughter's healing, a dog? Let's unpack this some more.
In a stunning response, that moved Jesus to reply in an entirely different way, the Canaanite woman tells Jesus that even dogs eat the scraps from the table. My goodness, out of love for her daughter, she begs Jesus not for His best, just throw me a bone, even your scraps Lord will be enough for me. I just want that part of you that you are willing to give to me Lord! O woman, GREAT is your faith. And then her daughter was healed.
What just happened here? Was this all planned out by Jesus to be another great teachable moment? Did not this whole encounter solicit an even greater response of faith that pointed to Jesus as Savior for all people? Do we not see the answer to these questions foreshadowed in today's 1st reading from Isaiah? Indeed we do! God WANTS to welcome all people into the kingdom, not based on race or geography but based on faith and a willingness to live His will. Jesus wants those who witness the dialogue between himself and this woman as an invitation for all to be saved, not based on race or geography but belief in Him as Lord, Son of David.
How are we, people of faith, to respond in the days ahead to the hearing of this Gospel? I think we can explore several lessons to be embraced in hearing His holy Word! First, do we, in our own lives and in our own challenges, call out to Jesus: have pity on me? Do we acknowledge Jesus, in our everyday going in and coming out, as Lord and Savior? And if we, in our own human weakness, perceive the answer to prayer or the calling out to Jesus as being slow in response, will we persevere in prayer, will we be bold enough to dialogue with Jesus, really dialogue, like the example of the Canaanite woman? When others run in to us this week, when we meet someone new, when come across someone different from us in race or nationality, will they say of us, great is his faith; how great her faith?
And can we also commit this week to ramp up our prayers for our persecuted brothers and sisters in places like Iraq and Syria and wherever they may be whose very lives are at risk as they profess themselves Christian, who simply long to eat the scraps from the Master's table?
Cruel to be kind? I don't think we need to go that far. Just be kind, and remain steadfast in faith and in prayer, loving the Master who loves and saves us!
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