Thursday, July 10, 2014

Sharing his story of healing, mercy and forgiveness

Walter Bonam, victim of violence, talks about forgiveness at Men's Day in New Orleans


Walter Bonam
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Marilyn Stewart By Marilyn Stewart The Times-Picayune
on July 09, 2014 







The bullet that paralyzed Walter Bonam from the chest down three years ago could also have left him bitter and resentful. Instead, Bonam leads a life marked by passion and grace as he leads others to embrace forgiveness.
Bonam, associate director of religious education for the Archdiocese of New Orleans, spoke at the recent Men's Day event at Second Free Mission Baptist Church, 1228 Burdette St.
"Walter inspired our congregation with his testimony of how he came to forgive the unknown assailant who barged his way into Walter's family home on that fateful night and shot him," said Timothy Ray, music director.
Bonam was gunned down in his eastern New Orleans home when he came to the aid of his wife, Jennifer, after a gunman entered their home and demanded money.
The incident forever changed his life and the lives of his wife and daughter, Bonam said in a phone interview. Confined to a wheelchair, Bonam suffers some hand impairment and is dependent upon his wife for certain daily tasks.
It was his faith, his "wonderfully devoted wife and wonderful daughter," and the encouragement and support of Archbishop Aymond, co-workers and friends that helped him move forward, Bonam said.
If this person had known the God I know, he wouldn't have done this to me, or anybody else. Walter Bonam
When others offer their admiration for the example he sets, he is humbled, Bonan said.
"I didn't set out to be an inspiration," Bonam said. "But I haven't spent a minute being angry. It is a grace God has given me."
Addressing the Men's Day theme of "Forsaking all to follow Christ," Bonam said that "forsaking all" may also mean leaving behind certain attitudes.
"We cherish our grudges," Bonam said. "Jesus calls us to move beyond our comfort zone and moving out of our comfort zone may mean abandoning some long cherished attitudes, including an attitude of unforgiveness."
Long known for his work toward racial reconciliation, Bonam was a member of the task force offering feedback to former Archbishop Alfred Hughes as Hughes drafted his 2006 pastoral letter calling for racial harmony.
Bonam said he believes he is called to be a "builder of bridges" spanning the gaps of inequality that remain. The former principal of St. Peter Claver School, Bonam serves on the Implementation Committee of the Office of Racial Harmony.
Racial discrimination is "an awful barrier" that prevents a significant portion of the population from developing its talents and gifts, Bonam said. Bonam's father served in WWII with The Tuskegee Airmen, the first group of African-American military aviators to serve in the United States armed forces.
"Walter is the most eloquent, poetic man I know.  His words to our church about how we should grow in faith and forgiveness were powerful," said Ray.
Instead of anger, Bonam said he feels pity for the man who shot him. "If this person had known the God I know, he wouldn't have done this to me, or anybody else."
When asked how a person can learn to forgive, Bonam said, "The deeper the wound, the greater the need for God's grace for forgiveness. But whatever it is that life throws at you, God will give you the grace to cope with it."

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