Sunday, June 19, 2011

Celebrating Father's

Father's Day is upon us again and at this afternoon hour I am relaxing with computer in lap and a good movie on the TV.  It's been a busy day!  I assisted at the 7 am and 9 am masses on this Sunday which also is Trinity Sunday; which is also the feast day of my parish.  Because of this our parish picnic was also today and my family attended to socialize with the church community.  Great food and fellowship!  And a surprisingly large turnout considering Father's Day.  And now the rest of the day will be devoted to rest!

Father's Day always seems to be a bit of a challenge for many.  And it surely seems to be a little less of a big deal than Mother's Day.  And that's OK by me.  I've spent many a Father's Day away on vacations and last year without the benefit of seeing either of my children; one lives far away and the other was in Europe for the summer.  At least this year my daughter is with me and I just had a very nice phone visit with my son.

Back to the challenge.  Father's Day for many can be a sad day.  I'm not talking about those of us whose father's are no longer with us.  I'm talking about the countless children who have absent fathers.  Recent statistics still point to an unacceptable level of absentee fathers.  I can never understand this although it has been such a profound reality in my own life.

My father was not around much in my life.  Hopelessly addicted to alcohol and a victim of related health issues, he had little interaction in my life and died by the time I was 15.  Gratefully, other men in my life stepped up and I did have father figures but never my own father to do things with, to share things or to witness those watershed moments in my life.  And I know of so many other close and personal instances where a relative or a friend failed to live up to their responsibility as a father and I have other friends who raise their children without the help of the fathers.  How sad.

Fatherhood is a gift from God.  Of course becoming a father has always been, in God's plan, part of the marriage covenant.  Having children running around with your last name and not being intimately involved with them or their mother is ashame.  As I've often said, and from the pulpit, the greatest gift a father can give their children is to love their mother.  And of course the great gift of presence cannot be discounted either.  Not presents; presence.  Little boys and girls, and not so little boys and girls, desperately want the affection, time and presence of dad.  As fathers reading this we must ask ourselves: is this true for us?

I love being a dad and am blessed with two great kids and a wonderful wife who is an equally wonderful mom.  And knowing all of this I realize that I can be even more of a great dad and regret some lapses in my earlier fatherhood days.  Here are some things as dads we all should do:  teach the children about God and the love of Jesus and pray with the kids.  Take them to church.  Be engaged.  Let them see you in prayer and let them know you love God.  Be a man's dad and be firm but fair.  Teach them something that will be both useful and a great lifetime memory.  Avoid the temptation to be their friend; you are dad, be that.   Show affection and never skip out on the I love you's.

I hope this is a wonderful Father's Day for all of you.  I hope that if you are a father you are actively involved in the life of your children.  And for the rest, I hope your memories and realities of fathers is happy and healthy.

And perhaps all of us can thank the Father above for all the gifts He gives us and ask Him to place all fathers under His provedential care and bless and protect all the children who do not have the love and support of dad.

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