The post I had hoped would have a happier story but it's my reality so here goes. You may recall that I embarked on a healthy eating lifestyle late last August and set a goal for some serious weight loss for my daughter's wedding. After losing about 10 lbs. on my own, I got involved with a program and a great coach and began to eat to live. Slowly but surely I dropped the weight and I lost another 58 lbs. on the plan. With just weeks before my daughter's April 30th wedding I was down 68 lbs. and an even better 80 lbs. from my all time high of near 340! I really liked the plan and knew this worked for me, but like bad grass that never goes away, neither does the addiction to bad food choices.
As the pace and stress of the rapidly approaching wedding became real I started giving in to some bad ideas. I would modify the plan on my own; try to outsmart the discipline, do my own thing. Thankfully, I was already too close to wedding day and I only packed on 3-4 lbs. My biggest mistake was looking at the wedding as a finish line and then, in my weakness, use the fact that I had "made it" as an excuse to keep on cutting corners.
Some 4 months after the wedding I knew the old habits I was allowing back into my life. Giving in to eating in the car from trip to trip, appointment to appointment, sneaking some fried food every now and again and treating myself to desserts and ice cream became more and more frequent. All this time I'm not reaching out for help and not even looking at the scale.
Today I did; the results predictable but not defeating. Since the wedding I've put on another 20 lbs., up a total of 24 lbs. from my low earlier this year.
I'm back on the plan and know what to expect. I know what to do, am prepared for the ups and downs, and will continue to persevere. But it's hard; will take plenty of prayer, lots of discipline and help, tons on help. For me, wanting to cheat, giving in to temptations, making excuses for life events as reasons to eat are all part of the disease; all part of the addiction.
I'm going to start losing weight again, I'm going back to do battle, I'm going to keep working on overcoming addiction. Please pray for me and with me as this is a battle. I'll try to keep you posted along the way.
Here I go, I know I can do this!
Showing posts with label eating to live. Show all posts
Showing posts with label eating to live. Show all posts
Monday, August 22, 2016
Wednesday, April 13, 2016
Weight loss journey still on-going but the struggles have crept in
I have not commented much on my weight loss/health journey in quite some time. To recap, I started sharing my story about 6 and a half months ago. I began a new eating plan at 320, after coming down on my own from 338 the year before. When last I left you guys I think we ended with me weighing about 265 sometime in January. And there I left it.
Well, the difficult entered in and the struggles again are real. Hopefully, I have learned some real lessons over these past 6 months so I am "holding my own". What does that mean? Simply, it means food choices are becoming a real battle again and weight loss has slowed down. Here is the good news: Since last I updated you I have indeed lost another 7 lbs. and weigh in the 258 range. This was recently confirmed on a visit to my cardiologist office, who commented that taking off over 60 lbs. is significant to improving my health.
The good and the bad of these past 3 months include struggling with the taste, texture and smell of the pre-packaged food, giving in more easily to some less than great choices juxtaposed against a knowledge that enough is enough, staying faithful to my water intake, begging my wife to make more salads. Like I said, the my previous life would have been talking about putting weight back on. So far, this is not the case. In these past few weeks, as I also prepare for a daughter's wedding, I have boxed up and put away about 8 pair of entirely too big pants, brought back to life about 6 pair of slacks from the bowels of my closet that now I fit in again, had to even order smaller underwear, and, because of the wedding, purchased the smallest suit I could in about 15 years!
But make no mistake, there are two realities I am squarely trying to deal with; first, 258 is still big and not optimally healthy and secondly, I need to improve these results over the last 100 days.
My early check ups with my primary doctor and cardiologist were really good; sadly, the effects of rheumatoid arthritis are still painfully with me everyday and the debilitating pain from a bad knee is getting worse. After this wedding, and hopefully even more weight loss, I need to see about possible knee replacement.
So here I am, struggling but trying and very desirous of even more weight loss and hopefully some relief from the pains I deal with. Look, let me be blunt and even address friends and readers who are too big, perhaps morbidly obese. Do something; it can be done. Go back and read my earlier posts when I began this. I weight right at 340, ate horribly and all day long, drank liters of diet soda daily. And I did not care, I embraced that lifestyle and even defended it. There is no defense for eating and drinking yourself to an early death. The plan I have been on, even with the current struggles, is solid and works. Getting up and moving, don't call it exercise, call it moving, can be done, even a big boy at 340. Do something! And when you stumble or even fall, acknowledge it, share your journey, rededicated yourself to stronger efforts.
I'm just trying to keep it real this morning. I am struggling but also claiming victory for what I have done and what I know I still need to do. Pray for me, and I will certainly pray for you!
Well, the difficult entered in and the struggles again are real. Hopefully, I have learned some real lessons over these past 6 months so I am "holding my own". What does that mean? Simply, it means food choices are becoming a real battle again and weight loss has slowed down. Here is the good news: Since last I updated you I have indeed lost another 7 lbs. and weigh in the 258 range. This was recently confirmed on a visit to my cardiologist office, who commented that taking off over 60 lbs. is significant to improving my health.
The good and the bad of these past 3 months include struggling with the taste, texture and smell of the pre-packaged food, giving in more easily to some less than great choices juxtaposed against a knowledge that enough is enough, staying faithful to my water intake, begging my wife to make more salads. Like I said, the my previous life would have been talking about putting weight back on. So far, this is not the case. In these past few weeks, as I also prepare for a daughter's wedding, I have boxed up and put away about 8 pair of entirely too big pants, brought back to life about 6 pair of slacks from the bowels of my closet that now I fit in again, had to even order smaller underwear, and, because of the wedding, purchased the smallest suit I could in about 15 years!
But make no mistake, there are two realities I am squarely trying to deal with; first, 258 is still big and not optimally healthy and secondly, I need to improve these results over the last 100 days.
My early check ups with my primary doctor and cardiologist were really good; sadly, the effects of rheumatoid arthritis are still painfully with me everyday and the debilitating pain from a bad knee is getting worse. After this wedding, and hopefully even more weight loss, I need to see about possible knee replacement.
So here I am, struggling but trying and very desirous of even more weight loss and hopefully some relief from the pains I deal with. Look, let me be blunt and even address friends and readers who are too big, perhaps morbidly obese. Do something; it can be done. Go back and read my earlier posts when I began this. I weight right at 340, ate horribly and all day long, drank liters of diet soda daily. And I did not care, I embraced that lifestyle and even defended it. There is no defense for eating and drinking yourself to an early death. The plan I have been on, even with the current struggles, is solid and works. Getting up and moving, don't call it exercise, call it moving, can be done, even a big boy at 340. Do something! And when you stumble or even fall, acknowledge it, share your journey, rededicated yourself to stronger efforts.
I'm just trying to keep it real this morning. I am struggling but also claiming victory for what I have done and what I know I still need to do. Pray for me, and I will certainly pray for you!
Friday, January 1, 2016
Saturday, December 12, 2015
Family, Grandparent, Permanent Deacon; reflecting on a Saturday morning!!
In previous posts, including my recent battle with weight loss, you have come to know me as an open book. In that one post I shared the whole truth, my addiction to food and the resulting poor health and I even openly declared my all time high weight of 338. Today I weigh 268 so I am making progress. I've used this blog to opine freely on things relative to my ministry, my own personal Catholicity and even politics. If you follow my blog you know that I am passionate about my sports team, especially LSU and the Saints, and that I can get irrational in my critique when things are bad and overly euphoric in those great times. I am also very passionate about my family and sometimes I try and share that however I do believe that you don't always need to put all your personal business out there in the world-wide blogosphere.
Who knows what will happen this morning with this post because as I sit here before sunrise on a Saturday morning I already know that I an very reflective, even a touch emotional! There are a couple of "life" events working as bookends this morning for my very reflective state. As all of you know, today would be my first full day home since leaving my North Carolina family behind after another amazing visit. The other bookend is realizing that tomorrow, December 13th, is my 7th anniversary since I was ordained a Permanent Deacon for the Catholic Church of the Archdiocese of New Orleans. Between these bookends is the ongoing reality of my own health battle, focused on that weight loss, and the realization that my wife continues to battle her own physical demons and the added pressure of her very unexpected unemployment.
Since Wendy became unemployed, we have managed 3 trips to North Carolina. Now some may say, and indeed they have, that seems like an expensive activity in light of the change in family financial dynamic. Yet we have found a way and would have probably suffered much emotional trauma if these trips would not have happened. I suspect all my fellow grandparents will understand. In July, our #1 granddaughter was born. We did not get to go and meet our Katelyn until she was about 3 weeks old but that was the reason for our July trip. And of course, while her momma was taking care of Katelyn, we were happy to run all around town with our #1 grandson Calvin. Fast forward to September and it was Calvin's 3rd birthday. Wendy and I have never missed Calvin's birthday celebrations so we used the Labor Day holiday to make another trip north. Now three years old, we enjoyed watching him grow up that birthday week before our very eyes. Of course Katelyn grew so much in just those six weeks between visits. As December drew closer and Wendy's health and work challenges continued I expressed serious, and I mean serious, concerns about another visit. Wendy found a way to make this happen and I for one applaud her problem-solving skills. But then there would be that other issue; she would be having more stents inserted into blocked arteries just 12 days before our scheduled departure. Wendy is tough, if not hard-headed and I knew this too would not stop her from her appointed rounds with Calvin and Katelyn. Last Sunday we arrived and set eyes on our grandkids for the first time in 3 months. Calvin just gets more and more grown up every time we see him and we were both blown away by the changes in Katelyn as she is now 5 months old. The first family event was a Christmas tree farm visit which was such a reminder that this is our family. Since my son moved to North Carolina he has been all in. He has built a great professional life there and then met the love of his life right there as well. He and Sara have been married over 5 years now and have given us that gift of our #1 grandchildren! We just had a great week. Wendy arrived bearing gift after gift after gift, many of which she painstakingly made by hand. Not only a labor of love but quite the cost savings compared to our normal Christmas present routine. Wendy and I got to take Calvin to school and pick him up all week and we also brought him to our favorite place, a Children's Museum right in the heart of town. We took Calvin to his favorite restaurant and I even got to see him play some basketball. As for Katelyn we got to play with her at home as she begins to talk and demonstrate her developing personalities. But that dreaded last day arrives and by this time yesterday Wendy and I had already been on the road 2 hours. We drive home all in one day since we get that hour back traveling from the east to the central time zone. It was a long hard drive but we were home by 6:30 pm.
While one always wants to look back and reflect on these precious memories, and indeed I do, my approach to coming home is to do so with purpose. You know on my own I am a very busy person. So I focus on what is coming up even though I want to go back and relive last week. As early as today I am back to full time ministry. I'll be assisting at Mass tonight and tomorrow morning and will also spend part of my Sunday visiting with my side of the family for a holiday gathering. Next week I will be returning to my prison ministry, arranging baptisms and RCIA. And of course with each passing day we are drawing closer to Christmas. I mentioned earlier that as a Deacon another anniversary dawns tomorrow. On December 13, 2008, I stood in St. Louis Cathedral in the heart of the French Quarter of New Orleans and had hands laid on me by Archbishop Hughes and became clergy. I, from that moment forward, would be a Permanent Deacon in the Archdiocese of New Orleans and assigned to prison ministry. I've said this before and will do so again, little did I know then how much prison ministry would mean to me personally as well as a Permanent Deacon. Sadly I have missed almost a month of visiting due to Wendy's last medical procedure and our family visit last week. I will get a chance to be with the men twice between now and Christmas, both this coming Wednesday night and December 23rd, always a joy because we take the time to read and review all the readings and prayers of Christmas Day. You know I remember both December 13th and the 14th of 2008 vividly. I can remember details of that ordination day and the beautiful gathering of family and friends afterwards to celebrate that awesome day. The following day, I vested as a Deacon for the first time and stood in the ambo of St. Jane de Chantal Church and delivered my 1st homily. I would do this again at the evening mass that same day. Between masses the parish threw me a wonderful celebration that was attended by over 100 folks. I will never forget that incredible weekend. And I am reflective of this event today as my anniversary approaches tomorrow. I will be at the 8 am Mass assisting. I will probably remember 7 years ago as I stand and proclaim tomorrow's Gospel and offer a personal prayer of thanksgiving. And I will remember that ministry is not a function or a task, this is who I am, and I pray that I remain constantly enthusiastic and serve with fervor for the rest of my life as a Permanent Deacon.
And as this time marches on I remember with love, care and concern, that my family remain close to me in both mind and heart and pray for Wendy's ongoing challenges from a position of faith and hope. Oh yes, by the way, I also must maintain my professional career as a banker and be present to both my staff and all my clients.
My reflection leads me here: it's a good life, full of many blessings and a reminder to express my thanksgiving more freely and frequently to God above! I love my family, including that unique indescribable love for Calvin and Katelyn and I ask God to forever guide me according to His will in ministry as a Permanent Deacon. And I thank Him especially today for these cogent moments of reflection and memory and for the gift of moving forward, always forward.
Peace be with you all!
Who knows what will happen this morning with this post because as I sit here before sunrise on a Saturday morning I already know that I an very reflective, even a touch emotional! There are a couple of "life" events working as bookends this morning for my very reflective state. As all of you know, today would be my first full day home since leaving my North Carolina family behind after another amazing visit. The other bookend is realizing that tomorrow, December 13th, is my 7th anniversary since I was ordained a Permanent Deacon for the Catholic Church of the Archdiocese of New Orleans. Between these bookends is the ongoing reality of my own health battle, focused on that weight loss, and the realization that my wife continues to battle her own physical demons and the added pressure of her very unexpected unemployment.
Since Wendy became unemployed, we have managed 3 trips to North Carolina. Now some may say, and indeed they have, that seems like an expensive activity in light of the change in family financial dynamic. Yet we have found a way and would have probably suffered much emotional trauma if these trips would not have happened. I suspect all my fellow grandparents will understand. In July, our #1 granddaughter was born. We did not get to go and meet our Katelyn until she was about 3 weeks old but that was the reason for our July trip. And of course, while her momma was taking care of Katelyn, we were happy to run all around town with our #1 grandson Calvin. Fast forward to September and it was Calvin's 3rd birthday. Wendy and I have never missed Calvin's birthday celebrations so we used the Labor Day holiday to make another trip north. Now three years old, we enjoyed watching him grow up that birthday week before our very eyes. Of course Katelyn grew so much in just those six weeks between visits. As December drew closer and Wendy's health and work challenges continued I expressed serious, and I mean serious, concerns about another visit. Wendy found a way to make this happen and I for one applaud her problem-solving skills. But then there would be that other issue; she would be having more stents inserted into blocked arteries just 12 days before our scheduled departure. Wendy is tough, if not hard-headed and I knew this too would not stop her from her appointed rounds with Calvin and Katelyn. Last Sunday we arrived and set eyes on our grandkids for the first time in 3 months. Calvin just gets more and more grown up every time we see him and we were both blown away by the changes in Katelyn as she is now 5 months old. The first family event was a Christmas tree farm visit which was such a reminder that this is our family. Since my son moved to North Carolina he has been all in. He has built a great professional life there and then met the love of his life right there as well. He and Sara have been married over 5 years now and have given us that gift of our #1 grandchildren! We just had a great week. Wendy arrived bearing gift after gift after gift, many of which she painstakingly made by hand. Not only a labor of love but quite the cost savings compared to our normal Christmas present routine. Wendy and I got to take Calvin to school and pick him up all week and we also brought him to our favorite place, a Children's Museum right in the heart of town. We took Calvin to his favorite restaurant and I even got to see him play some basketball. As for Katelyn we got to play with her at home as she begins to talk and demonstrate her developing personalities. But that dreaded last day arrives and by this time yesterday Wendy and I had already been on the road 2 hours. We drive home all in one day since we get that hour back traveling from the east to the central time zone. It was a long hard drive but we were home by 6:30 pm.
While one always wants to look back and reflect on these precious memories, and indeed I do, my approach to coming home is to do so with purpose. You know on my own I am a very busy person. So I focus on what is coming up even though I want to go back and relive last week. As early as today I am back to full time ministry. I'll be assisting at Mass tonight and tomorrow morning and will also spend part of my Sunday visiting with my side of the family for a holiday gathering. Next week I will be returning to my prison ministry, arranging baptisms and RCIA. And of course with each passing day we are drawing closer to Christmas. I mentioned earlier that as a Deacon another anniversary dawns tomorrow. On December 13, 2008, I stood in St. Louis Cathedral in the heart of the French Quarter of New Orleans and had hands laid on me by Archbishop Hughes and became clergy. I, from that moment forward, would be a Permanent Deacon in the Archdiocese of New Orleans and assigned to prison ministry. I've said this before and will do so again, little did I know then how much prison ministry would mean to me personally as well as a Permanent Deacon. Sadly I have missed almost a month of visiting due to Wendy's last medical procedure and our family visit last week. I will get a chance to be with the men twice between now and Christmas, both this coming Wednesday night and December 23rd, always a joy because we take the time to read and review all the readings and prayers of Christmas Day. You know I remember both December 13th and the 14th of 2008 vividly. I can remember details of that ordination day and the beautiful gathering of family and friends afterwards to celebrate that awesome day. The following day, I vested as a Deacon for the first time and stood in the ambo of St. Jane de Chantal Church and delivered my 1st homily. I would do this again at the evening mass that same day. Between masses the parish threw me a wonderful celebration that was attended by over 100 folks. I will never forget that incredible weekend. And I am reflective of this event today as my anniversary approaches tomorrow. I will be at the 8 am Mass assisting. I will probably remember 7 years ago as I stand and proclaim tomorrow's Gospel and offer a personal prayer of thanksgiving. And I will remember that ministry is not a function or a task, this is who I am, and I pray that I remain constantly enthusiastic and serve with fervor for the rest of my life as a Permanent Deacon.
And as this time marches on I remember with love, care and concern, that my family remain close to me in both mind and heart and pray for Wendy's ongoing challenges from a position of faith and hope. Oh yes, by the way, I also must maintain my professional career as a banker and be present to both my staff and all my clients.
My reflection leads me here: it's a good life, full of many blessings and a reminder to express my thanksgiving more freely and frequently to God above! I love my family, including that unique indescribable love for Calvin and Katelyn and I ask God to forever guide me according to His will in ministry as a Permanent Deacon. And I thank Him especially today for these cogent moments of reflection and memory and for the gift of moving forward, always forward.
Peace be with you all!
Saturday, December 5, 2015
My personal journey continues
Today I had to get on the scale. It's been 4 weeks and I was concerned because I knew there was some cheating going on. Now I don't cheat like the old days. When I say cheating maybe I ate 2 meals and only 4 replacements or my cheat meal would be a Subway sandwich. And for good measure, add some cheese. But I reflected over these 4 weeks that I ate no chocolate, no regular sodas, no burgers, no fries.
Today needed to be the day I weighed in, after all it has been 4 weeks. When last we visited this scene I tipped the scales at 277, down 41 lbs. from the starting weight of my diet. Today it hit 268 and now I can officially say I have lost over 50 lbs. It's been a little over 3 and a half months but I am very pleased. I know deep down that I could have done more, but for now I celebrate success and keep on being accountable.
I have 5 full months to my daughter's wedding and it would be so cool to lose 80 lbs. maybe more before that big event. Hang on, we will find out together!
Today needed to be the day I weighed in, after all it has been 4 weeks. When last we visited this scene I tipped the scales at 277, down 41 lbs. from the starting weight of my diet. Today it hit 268 and now I can officially say I have lost over 50 lbs. It's been a little over 3 and a half months but I am very pleased. I know deep down that I could have done more, but for now I celebrate success and keep on being accountable.
I have 5 full months to my daughter's wedding and it would be so cool to lose 80 lbs. maybe more before that big event. Hang on, we will find out together!
Monday, September 21, 2015
A Monday morning accountability update
In my on-going battle to lose weight, beat my addiction and live healthier, I finally got below the 300 lb. mark last Monday in my last update to you. I'm happy to say that I lost another 4+ lbs. since that update and now am at 294, a full 6 lbs. below the 300's that I've lived with for many many years!
My coach told me back in August that if I follow the plan and stay committed I would lose 3-5 lbs. every week. So far so good.
My total weight loss since the day I first weighed in is now at 24lbs. It will be a month since I started this new life on Friday!
Here is the link to my story in case you have not read it yet: http://abitadeacon.blogspot.com/2015/08/the-post-that-is-so-long-overdue-coming.html
My coach told me back in August that if I follow the plan and stay committed I would lose 3-5 lbs. every week. So far so good.
My total weight loss since the day I first weighed in is now at 24lbs. It will be a month since I started this new life on Friday!
Here is the link to my story in case you have not read it yet: http://abitadeacon.blogspot.com/2015/08/the-post-that-is-so-long-overdue-coming.html
Monday, September 14, 2015
Accountability update #2
My last accountability update revealed that I was down to 300.8 and was very much looking forward to saying good-bye to the 300's forever. I came back from my week long vacation, where I did not cheat, but failed to eat all my replacement meals, and weighed myself only to discover I lost .1 lbs. Yes, one week later, I weighed 300.7. I was distressed and concerned but determined.
Missing these meal replacements is almost as bad as cheating. You have to follow this eating plan in the early days to a tee! So I did that over the weekend, had lots of energy and decided to take a peek at the scale today!
The great news: 298.6!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
For the first time in maybe 8-9 years I am below 300. I am so relieved. The weight has indeed come off slowly, only losing 2.2 lbs. in the past 10 days. But that is ok. Remember, I started this journey from 318.5 after previously being as high as 338 about 3 years ago!
I'm fighting my addiction, taking control of my life and eating to live.
Next weigh in is Friday!
Missing these meal replacements is almost as bad as cheating. You have to follow this eating plan in the early days to a tee! So I did that over the weekend, had lots of energy and decided to take a peek at the scale today!
The great news: 298.6!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
For the first time in maybe 8-9 years I am below 300. I am so relieved. The weight has indeed come off slowly, only losing 2.2 lbs. in the past 10 days. But that is ok. Remember, I started this journey from 318.5 after previously being as high as 338 about 3 years ago!
I'm fighting my addiction, taking control of my life and eating to live.
Next weigh in is Friday!
Monday, August 31, 2015
The post that is so long overdue, coming clean with my addiction
Now that I have your attention! But I truly do have an addiction and just saying it today is therapeutic. Many of you don't know me, have never seen me in person. Others have and a few have known me for quite some time. I have no idea what those folks would tell you if asked to describe me but I'm guessing one word that comes to mind would be big. Yes indeed, I am a big boy.
I wasn't always a big fella but the reality is over the years I have packed on the pounds. Looking back, you never know why or even how this all started. I know when I moved to Abita Springs in January 1996, I weighed 240. For a guy that stands 5'11" that is big, but manageable. My thoughts were I've just bought this place with 10 acres so this should be the ideal place to lose some weight. Slowly but surely, over these past 19 years, I've done nothing but gain weight.
I'm ok confessing the truth because I feel like I need to. Maybe I'm looking for some tangible accountability. As the weight continued to pile on, I reached an all time high of 338 lbs. and a 54 inch waist. Yes, over time, I developed high blood pressure, type-2 diabetes, sleep apnea, rheumatoid arthritis, damaged knees and an occasional flare up of irregular heart rhythm. Medications are wonderful but in reality, they just help you live with the diseases not cure the diseases..
Something called a hernia and subsequent surgery helped me drop down to a slightly more comfortable 320. I had hoped that this would be a catalyst to some weight loss. It was not. I gained back some weight and settled in around 328. More than once, I had to admit that I was addicted to bad food choices and that was just who I am and what I do. What? Yep, that's how I felt.
A couple of months ago while visiting my family in North Carolina my son took me aside and gave me the talk. He told me that despite what anyone else says or does, I had to take control of my life and lose some weight. It was heartfelt and true, and it impressed me yet still I found myself driving to Bud's Broiler and craving a #4 with hickory sauce and fries lathered with cheese and same hickory sauce. If we bought doughnuts for the office, some how, some way, I had two or three. My favorite thing to drink was diet soda, at least it said diet, right. Guess what, I easily consumed 150-200 ounces of that stuff every day. I maybe drank 1 bottle of water in the same day; maybe.
A couple of weeks ago I saw a post on Facebook from a Deacon friend who had lost 38 pounds and was off more than half his meds; many the same that I am now forced to take. I commented on his post and to my surprise I was contacted directly by his "health coach". We had a great talk and just last week, I began a journey to better health and am following a eating plan that makes sense. Now I've said this before, I'm starting a diet! This is really a life choice and a choice to live. You see I must be able to say out loud and admit to others that if I do nothing, I will die a relatively young man.
The week before I started the "plan" I made some simple decisions. I eliminated sodas and other stuff and went on an 80 ounces of water plan, eliminated all fast food, started eating healthier protein. Then last week I began the "plan" which for now means 5 meal replacements a day and one healthy meal of protein and green vegetables. In these past two weeks, starting out at 318.5 I now weigh 305. First let me share with you that being almost 340 could not have been more miserable. Miserable! Physically, mentally, being huge is not fun. It's really like the old tears of a clown thing. Yet I had to admit that this is all on me. All me!
305 is a lot better than almost 340 but it is not healthy and it still feels bad. 305 is not going to fix my medical problems but it does give me hope. Let me be real, being fat impacts every aspect of your life because it's just darn unhealthy. Losing this recent weight though has given me not only hope but a determination that I have not felt, interiorly in like forever.
Some of my short term goals are to lose 75 pounds by my daughters wedding in April, drop some important inches off my waist, get healthy. Long-term, whatever that may be, is to one day get below 200 lbs.; something that I have not seen since the early eighties. But it's one pound, one inch at a time. I think I will see below 300 within a week and a half. That will be a big day. I first remember toping the 300 pound mark about 13 years ago. I want to get below this mark and stay there forever.
The eating "plan" is fairly easy and manageable. I won't lie to you, I still want a Bud's Broiler, or pizza or doughnut. Most of what I eat now is tasty, some not so much. But I'm trying to change my dynamic from living to eat to eating to live.
I'm a busy man, between work, home life, and my ministry as a Permanent Deacon I've allowed myself to eat on the run, in my car, pulling in and out of places like McDonalds, Sonic, Burger King. Those days need to be over and hopefully they are.
So why am I telling YOU all of this. Because for me, I must! I have to admit, I am addicted to bad eating, I am way to fat, unhealthy and I need to live! Not only do I want to grow old but I want to really live while living. This is kind of my story and my opportunity to be held accountable. And it's my opportunity to ask you to pray for me as this journey will be hard, indeed it will!
Now don't look for boring daily updates here but from time to time allow me to let you know my ups and downs, well, hopefully my downs when it comes to weight and inches.
And realize that everyone has some struggle. Heavy people are struggling, even when you come across those of us who are always appearing happy and extrovert. It's still a struggle. Thanks for your listening "ear" and let's see what God has in store for me!
I wasn't always a big fella but the reality is over the years I have packed on the pounds. Looking back, you never know why or even how this all started. I know when I moved to Abita Springs in January 1996, I weighed 240. For a guy that stands 5'11" that is big, but manageable. My thoughts were I've just bought this place with 10 acres so this should be the ideal place to lose some weight. Slowly but surely, over these past 19 years, I've done nothing but gain weight.
I'm ok confessing the truth because I feel like I need to. Maybe I'm looking for some tangible accountability. As the weight continued to pile on, I reached an all time high of 338 lbs. and a 54 inch waist. Yes, over time, I developed high blood pressure, type-2 diabetes, sleep apnea, rheumatoid arthritis, damaged knees and an occasional flare up of irregular heart rhythm. Medications are wonderful but in reality, they just help you live with the diseases not cure the diseases..
Something called a hernia and subsequent surgery helped me drop down to a slightly more comfortable 320. I had hoped that this would be a catalyst to some weight loss. It was not. I gained back some weight and settled in around 328. More than once, I had to admit that I was addicted to bad food choices and that was just who I am and what I do. What? Yep, that's how I felt.
A couple of months ago while visiting my family in North Carolina my son took me aside and gave me the talk. He told me that despite what anyone else says or does, I had to take control of my life and lose some weight. It was heartfelt and true, and it impressed me yet still I found myself driving to Bud's Broiler and craving a #4 with hickory sauce and fries lathered with cheese and same hickory sauce. If we bought doughnuts for the office, some how, some way, I had two or three. My favorite thing to drink was diet soda, at least it said diet, right. Guess what, I easily consumed 150-200 ounces of that stuff every day. I maybe drank 1 bottle of water in the same day; maybe.
A couple of weeks ago I saw a post on Facebook from a Deacon friend who had lost 38 pounds and was off more than half his meds; many the same that I am now forced to take. I commented on his post and to my surprise I was contacted directly by his "health coach". We had a great talk and just last week, I began a journey to better health and am following a eating plan that makes sense. Now I've said this before, I'm starting a diet! This is really a life choice and a choice to live. You see I must be able to say out loud and admit to others that if I do nothing, I will die a relatively young man.
The week before I started the "plan" I made some simple decisions. I eliminated sodas and other stuff and went on an 80 ounces of water plan, eliminated all fast food, started eating healthier protein. Then last week I began the "plan" which for now means 5 meal replacements a day and one healthy meal of protein and green vegetables. In these past two weeks, starting out at 318.5 I now weigh 305. First let me share with you that being almost 340 could not have been more miserable. Miserable! Physically, mentally, being huge is not fun. It's really like the old tears of a clown thing. Yet I had to admit that this is all on me. All me!
305 is a lot better than almost 340 but it is not healthy and it still feels bad. 305 is not going to fix my medical problems but it does give me hope. Let me be real, being fat impacts every aspect of your life because it's just darn unhealthy. Losing this recent weight though has given me not only hope but a determination that I have not felt, interiorly in like forever.
Some of my short term goals are to lose 75 pounds by my daughters wedding in April, drop some important inches off my waist, get healthy. Long-term, whatever that may be, is to one day get below 200 lbs.; something that I have not seen since the early eighties. But it's one pound, one inch at a time. I think I will see below 300 within a week and a half. That will be a big day. I first remember toping the 300 pound mark about 13 years ago. I want to get below this mark and stay there forever.
The eating "plan" is fairly easy and manageable. I won't lie to you, I still want a Bud's Broiler, or pizza or doughnut. Most of what I eat now is tasty, some not so much. But I'm trying to change my dynamic from living to eat to eating to live.
I'm a busy man, between work, home life, and my ministry as a Permanent Deacon I've allowed myself to eat on the run, in my car, pulling in and out of places like McDonalds, Sonic, Burger King. Those days need to be over and hopefully they are.
So why am I telling YOU all of this. Because for me, I must! I have to admit, I am addicted to bad eating, I am way to fat, unhealthy and I need to live! Not only do I want to grow old but I want to really live while living. This is kind of my story and my opportunity to be held accountable. And it's my opportunity to ask you to pray for me as this journey will be hard, indeed it will!
Now don't look for boring daily updates here but from time to time allow me to let you know my ups and downs, well, hopefully my downs when it comes to weight and inches.
And realize that everyone has some struggle. Heavy people are struggling, even when you come across those of us who are always appearing happy and extrovert. It's still a struggle. Thanks for your listening "ear" and let's see what God has in store for me!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)